the ruthless anarchy

the mysteries that surround me
tethered by the steps in reflection,
You-
with the pride of a lion
and lies of a wild fire,
Ships are doomed and drowned to suffocation
i possess a social anxiety disgusted by the presence of deceit.

time does run out and hours surely crack
your words are so vague and light weight
it just vanished in thin air.
no matter how strong the sketches are
its all a colorful deception
a portrayal of hypocrisy.

its a ruthless anarchy
blazing bullets through the innocence
traitor
swimming across with the thought of dishonesty
dont hold me in contempt
your third face finally revealed
there shall be a resurrection of voices for your malice.

 

 

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Suicide Note

[q:Why don’t u just get over someone who broke ur heart?
Ans:cause this heart loved her so much….
so much so that i was willing to destroy myself for that girl
and this is me destroying myself]

happiness is a choice
i choose to have it with you
but with you gone out of me forever
under the arms of other
i can feel the photographs of you
crawling beneath my skin
ripping me apart, piece by piece.
so with this heavy heart pulling me down
there is no rising above
i am better yet sunken under this concrete floor
and adapt to the ashes of life-no-more.
the ecstasy of survival
-food, air, water-
seems nothing but futile
suffice no more for the living
as i am no more than dead.

there are no cut marks on my skin
no blood massacre
on the floor
to ease this pain.
no more denial of irresistability
fuck all the responsibility
i am just gonna pop these pills of solace
and lay myself to rest.
end the cycle of transmigration
this is me- self-destruction.

last words for you
hope you honor it:-
and i want you to go tell my mom
its you,
you are the reason her son is dead
you are the reason for her suffering
as you were the reason for his suffering.